Happiness For Blessing

The Office will bring its 9 year run to an end tomorrow night. It's been a while since the show was particularly relevant, but in its heyday, it was absolutely one of the best comedies on the air. I've used the series finale as an excuse to go back and revisit some of my favorite episodes. Below are numbers 25 through 11. I will post my top ten tomorrow morning.

25. Prince Family Paper

Michael, as a favor to David Wallace, goes to do some reconnaissance work on one of Dunder Mifflin's tiny competitors a county over from the Scranton branch, and he brings Dwight along to help. The story is funny enough, as Michael and Dwight interacting with each other on the road is usually enough to fill an episode. They decide to divide and conquer, with Michael posing as a potential customer while Dwight applies for a job at the same time. Their not-so-subtle attempts to gather information are hardly noticed by the naive Prince family, and the patriarch ends up actually handing Michael a list of their top clients, then fixing his bumper in the parking lot after a botched getaway. What really makes the episode sing in my eyes is what goes on back at the office. The Dunder Mifflin-ites are always looking for ways to distract themselves, especially when the boss is out, and an argument about the attractiveness - no, hotness - of actress Hilary Swank turns into a full-on debate, complete with PowerPoint presentations and a hilariously impassioned speech from Stanley, of all people. In the end, the group remains split, Michael inadvertently breaks the tie, and Oscar gets philosophical. "That's the thing about debating. People just get entrenched in the views they already had."



24. Safety Training

Michael has always had an inferiority complex when it comes to the warehouse, so when the entire office is forced to undergo safety training downstairs because of a forklift incident involving Michael, he doesn't take kindly to the suggestion that the blue collar workers face inherently more dangerous conditions than the office workers on a daily basis. It was only natural, then, that after reading up on depression in the workplace, he would fake a suicide attempt in view of all the employees. What follows is a highly scripted exchange between he and Dwight from the rooftop - so good it had to be done twice. Michael's plan, of course, was poorly thought out, as it turned out he was planning on landing on a bouncehouse after jumping from the roof. ("I'm going to need you to acquire an inflatable house or castle." "Do you want a drawbridge?") He thinks about jumping anyway, but Darrell finally manages to answer the question "What do I have to live for?" to Michael's satisfaction. "Uh...a lot."

This is the third year that I've reviewed all of the movies nominated for the Academy Award for Best Picture, but the first that I haven't dedicated a separate blog post to each one. I'm rather busy, what with the job and the upcoming baby and all. Oh, and did I mention that I now blog for a real website?

In any case, I did watch all 1o movies again and I've provided a short (in most cases) review for each one. In my opinion, this is one of the strongest years for nominees in recent memory, and I honestly liked all of them. The reviews, therefore, can sometimes take a negative tone, but that's because I'm nitpicking. I've ranked them all from #10 to #1 below. All you have to do is follow the jump.

I haven't posted my reviews for The Hurt Locker or The Blind Side yet. I have seen them; I just need to write them up. They will be posted later tonight or tomorrow. I wanted to get my rankings up before the actual ceremony, though. This the order that I personally rank them, not a prediction.

1. Inglourious Basterds
2. Up
3. A Serious Man
4. Avatar
5. Precious: Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire
6. The Hurt Locker
7. An Education
8. Up in the Air
9. District 9
10. The Blind Side

Lots of people love to hate Bono, the lead singer of U2. A lot of it has to do with his perceived vapid self-importance.

I disagree with this viewpoint. I've been paying attention to Bono's guest columns with the New York Times, and they have been intelligent, articulate, and relevant. Here's a list of his Top 10 something or others of the next decade. (I didn't say he could stay on topic.)

There's not a comment page on the NYT website (probably a good thing), so I'm interested to hear your thoughts.

8 - Loyalty to conference?

The bizarre ranking system (#3) and lack of a playoff (#2) means that your chosen team looks better if the other teams in the same conference perform better. This sets up some bizarre rooting situations. Fans end up cheering for their hated rivals when they play against teams from neighboring conferences. Last week I observed two fans cheering for Oklahoma State against Georgia. One fan was dressed head to toe in Oklahoma apparel while the other sported Texas A&M gear. They weren't rooting for Oklahoma State so much as against the hated SEC. But in what sport is it okay to cheer for a conference or division rival?

7 - The NCAA's ridiculous rules

Recently my alma mater was forced to vacate its wins from the 2007 season because of recruiting and amateur status violations. The crime? Allowing a student to take an admissions test on a computer in the athletics department. Apparently not going to the library was reason enough to erase a playoff season (this is Division 2). The sad part is, you're probably reading this and saying, "That's nothing. My school wasn't allowed to go to any bowl games for 5 years because our coach spent too much time on the phone with a kid." And that's ridiculous. I understand that the amateur status of student-athletes needs to be protected, but the NCAA ends up picking on small schools and letting others get away with highway robbery. The rules are not enforced evenly because some schools have boosters and money and all kinds of influence. Which leads us to...

6 - Student-athletes at big-time football schools are not really amateurs

This is the biggest open secret in college football. Once in a while, somebody like Rhett Bomar or Reggie Bush gets caught. The NCAA was forced to act on Bomar because he still had time to play, but in Bush's case, they basically left well enough alone. Meanwhile, small schools like mine (#10) are punished for minor violations. Neither USC nor Oklahoma had to vacate wins. The fact is, football factories use boosters like politicians do PACs - funnel the money somewhere else, and if something goes wrong, there's no accountability to the parties that are actually responsible.

5 - 1 foot vs. 2 foot, down when touched

Let's get to some on-the-field stuff. Some of the rules that make college football "distinctive" from the pros are simply ridiculous. Exhibit A is the rule that once your knee hits the ground, you are down. It doesn't matter if you were tackled or if there's nobody within 20 yards. If this is the case, why not call an incomplete pass if you bobble the ball before securing it? Exhibit B is the one foot inbounds for a completed catch rule. You cannot argue that this makes the college game more exciting. Inaccurate passes and lazy receiving is rewarded in this system.

4 - Parity

As I type this, I have a choice of watching 4 football games. Not one of them holds any interest to me, because the teams are so unevenly matched. I flipped to the Florida-Troy game to see how it was going, and Florida was winning by 32 points in the second quarter. You don't attend or watch that game expecting to see an actual competition. You watch it because (1) You went to one of the two schools, (2) You want to be watching in case Troy pulls off the impossible, or (3) You have money on the game. The gambling line for this game was -37. The biggest line in the NFL this week? -13.5, a game that involves the only winless team in NFL history, the Detroit Lions. The worst team in the NFL has a legit shot at winning every week. You cannot say the same for many teams in college football. Another way to say that is you can turn into any pro game and expect a fairly evenly-matched game. Of the 4 games I mentioned earlier, only 1 is what you might call competitive.

3 - Rankings & Schedule

It's hard to separate this from the lack of a playoff system (#2), but let me try with a hypothetical.

Let's say Prestigious Team A is ranked #8 in the preseason poll. Less Prestigious Team B is ranked #19 in the same poll. In Week 1, Prestigious Team A loses to Very Prestigious Team C (#5) by a small margin while Less Prestigious Team B beats Less Prestigious Team D (unranked) comfortably, but not in a blowout. In the Week 1 poll, Prestigious Team A drops to #13, while Less Prestigious Team B jumps up to #14. Both teams win out, and at the end of the year, Prestigious Team A remains ranked above Less Prestigious Team B, despite Team B having a better record. The reason? The teams never played each other, nor did they have any common opponents, meaning even computer formulas were useless and relied on things like margin of victory, which is code for running up the score. The entire season for both of these teams hinged how they were ranked in the preseason, before anybody settled anything on the field.

2 - Playoffs

I realize this is a contentious subject, but let me say this: I cannot respect college football as a viable competitive sport until it finds a better way to determine its champion. I probably don't need to make the case for a playoff system - that's been done numerous times. If you believe that the BCS is the best system for postseason play, you are either (A) a college president, (B) a retard, or (C) both.

I will say this: Less prestigious schools that continue to be forced out of the national championship discussion should form their own league or division.

1 - Logic

If I had only argument for the superiority of the pro game to the college game, it's this simple point: the pro game features the best athletes playing against the best athletes. Not many people argue that minor league baseball is better than the major leagues, and that's essentially what college football is: a glorified minor league system. At least in minor league baseball, the teams are fairly evenly matched!

4 Reasons I can see the other point of view:

4 - Overtime

Pro overtime is flawed. Each offense should get a shot at scoring. I like college overtime a lot, but there is one change I would make: move the starting position back from the 25 yard line. I think teams ought to have to work to get into field goal territory.

3 - The option

This is one of the most exciting plays in football, in my opinion, and you rarely see it in the pro game. The reason points back to my earlier point (pro players aren't fooled by the option), but I would like to see more innovation in the pro game like we see in college.

2 - Greed of the Shield

It is well documented that the NFL is a greedy league. Proponents of college football can point to NFL blackout restrictions, and I have no answer for that.

1 - Fans/Atmosphere at games

This is the number 1 argument I hear from people who "don't know anything about the NFL because I don't watch it." Seriously, is there anything more annoying than that? Except for Apple fanboys, of course.

Anyway, it's hard to argue against a college atmosphere, especially when some NFL teams have lame, gimmicky fanbases. I'm looking at you, Oakland, Washington, and New York (Jets). I suppose my response is that the product on the field is inferior.

I posted this on Odd Man Rush as well.

Opening Day is here!

Predicted Standings for 2009

First number in parentheses is predicted # of wins, following number is differential from 2008.

AL East
New York (98, +8)
Tampa Bay (Wild Card) (94, –3)
Boston (90, –5)
Toronto (84, –2)
Baltimore (67, –1)

AL Central
Chicago (91, +2)
Minnesota (89, +1)
Kansas City (80, +5)
Cleveland (77, –4)
Detroit (76, +2)

AL West
Los Angeles of Anaheim (91, –9)
Texas (83, +4)
Oakland (79, +4)
Seattle (66, +5)


NL East
New York (94, +5)
Philadelphia (Wild Card) (92, +/-0)
Florida (81, –3)
Atlanta (75, +3)
Washington (58, –1)

NL Central
Chicago (95, –2)
Cincinnati (88, +14)
St. Louis (84, –2)
Milwaukee (80, –10)
Houston (73, –13)
Pittsburgh (66, –1)

NL West
Los Angeles (95, +11)
Arizona (86, +4)
San Francisco (78, +6)
Colorado (62, –12)
San Diego (60, –3)


Preseason Power Rankings

1. Tampa Bay Rays
2. Boston Red Sox
3. Chicago Cubs
4. New York Yankees
5. New York Mets
6. Philadelphia Phillies
7. Los Angeles Dodgers
8. Chicago White Sox
9. Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim
10. Minnesota Twins
11. St. Louis Cardinals
12. Toronto Blue Jays
13. Cincinnati Reds
14. Arizona Diamondbacks
15. Texas Rangers
16. Oakland Athletics
17. Florida Marlins
18. Milwaukee Brewers
19. Cleveland Indians
20. San Francisco Giants
21. Atlanta Braves
22. Kansas City Royals
23. Detroit Tigers
24. Colorado Rockies
25. Houston Astros
26. Baltimore Orioles
27. Seattle Mariners
28. Pittsburgh Pirates
29. San Diego Padres
30. Washington Nationals

Individual Awards – American League

The top vote-getters are listed in order for voting awards, and in statistical order for other awards.

MVP: Mark Teixeira, Grady Sizemore, Josh Hamilton
Cy Young: Roy Halladay, Jon Lester, Joe Nathan
Rookie of the Year: Matt LaPorta, Matt Wieters, David Price
Comeback Player of the Year: Francisco Liriano, David Ortiz, Andruw Jones
Batting Champ: Ian Kinsler, Nick Markakis, Dustin Pedroia
Home Run Champ: Grady Sizemore, Evan Longoria, Jermaine Dye
RBI Champ: Josh Hamilton, Mark Teixeira, Kevin Youkilis
ERA Champ: Roy Halladay, Jon Lester, CC Sabathia
Wins Champ: Roy Halladay, Daisuke Matsuzaka, Andy Sonnanstine
Strikeout Champ: CC Sabathia, Roy Halladay, Zack Greinke
Saves Champ: Joe Nathan, Jonathan Papelbon, David Price


Individual Awards – National League

The top vote-getters are listed in order for voting awards, and in statistical order for other awards.

MVP: Albert Pujols, David Wright, Aramis Ramirez
Cy Young: Tim Lincecum, Cole Hamels, Brandon Webb
Rookie of the Year: Cameron Maybin, Andrew McCutchen, Jason Motte
Comeback Player of the Year: Aaron Harang, Troy Tulowitzki, Chris Carpenter
Batting Champ: Albert Pujols, Lance Berkman, Ryan Theriot
Home Run Champ: Ryan Braun, Albert Pujols, David Wright
RBI Champ: David Wright, Aramis Ramirez, Albert Pujols
ERA Champ: Tim Lincecum, Rich Harden, Johan Santana
Wins Champ: Brandon Webb, Cole Hamels, Chad Billingsley
Strikeout Champ: Tim Lincecum, Cole Hamels, Dan Haren
Saves Champ: Brad Lidge, Francisco Rodriguez, Jonathan Broxton

Some things you can look forward to in this space:

• A weekly collection of links that I'll post on the weekend. A clever name is coming - if you have suggestions, let me know.
• I'll soon be asking for some input on a special project I'm working on. Be watching for that sometime after I get my laptop back (it's in the shop).
• A preview of the 2009 baseball season.
• Another weekly feature: Listmania!
  
• An upcoming opinionated piece about a somewhat controversial topic - consider yourself teased.

I'll be implementing all of this stuff soon, so stay tuned!

Over the past several days, I've been providing you with my own personal reviews of all of this year's Best Picture nominees. They are ranked below. These are preferences, not predictions, and you can click on the name of each film to read its review.

I believe that Slumdog Millionaire is far and away the best film out of the five nominees. Milk and Frost/Nixon were both very compelling, but suffered from structural flaws. I can't help but think that there were other more worthy nominees than The Reader or Benjamin Button. I find it interesting that each story is told through flashbacks. This is certainly not a new literary device, but I wonder if we might see more movies in the coming months utilizing them as a response.




Winner: Slumdog Millionaire
Milk
Frost/Nixon
The Reader
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button